So who am I? I'm a normal chap in my late 30s with a wife (near enough) and a beautiful daughter of 18 months old, I live in a little postcard cottage in the middle of a beautiful Kentish village & have a good job. My name is David.
My life on papers seems very nice & plesent but inside I have a monster that churns and churns with my emotions which can take a perfectly healthy man down to an emotional wreck in a matter of minutes, this diseased monster is called Hypochondria or Health Anxiety as they call it now. I don't really know when it started or why I became so worried about things all the time but what I do know is it is effecting my life and I really want to take that control back.
So why am I scared of getting an incurable illness? Bottom line, because I do not want to die, dying is my biggest fear & although my day will eventually come I try to block out those feelings. I don't know if I'm the traditional type of hypo or I'm more of a logical hypo the reason I say this is because it takes a good few weeks of illness before I start to get worried where as I expect others to worry from the start. I have had every illness known to man, headache is a brain tumour, tonsil infection is cancer, abdominal pain is stomach or pancreatic cancer, a tingle in the legs is MS, I could go on but you get what I'm saying.
So over the years how many of these incurable illnesses have I actually been diagnosed with......The answer is zero, how many did I think I definitely had at the time.......every one but I'm still here and still fighting for sanity.
So why a blog David? Well for two reasons, so I can keep a track of all the "supposed" illnesses I have got so I can look back in time and see how ridiculous I am & to try to help and connect with others with the same problems.
Nice meeting you all.
it's currently Christmas Eve 2015 and I'm dealing with a case of Pancreatic cancer or IBS or Chronic pancreatitis or stomach ulcers or something else unknown that I haven't already researched. I have a pain in the left side of my body under the left rib, 4 doctors have told me they think it's muscular but my head thinks different, I've had blood tests, chest X-ray, blood pressure checks, ECG, as well as a doctors one or one with me but I still get worried, I'm an idiot I know but hey that's just the illness, I'll let you know how I get on with this one when it eventually comes to an end when the pain subsides.
David
